As soon as the audience saw these questions, one man in the front row hollered out, “Oh, s-!” The room laughed nervously while we privately feared commencing the Worst Conference Experience Ever. One of the most powerful ways to connect with others is through conversation starters. These questions are often personal and reflect the listener’s interests, or at the very least, the speaker’s obsession. The prompts included: “For what in your life do you feel most grateful?” “If you were going to become a close friend with the other participant, please share what would be important for him or her to know” and “Can you describe a time you cried in front of another person?” We adapted these prompts from a procedure designed by psychologist Arthur Aron and his colleagues to create more intimate conversations between strangers. Apby Naveen Bommakanti Deep conversation starters are questions that elicit a deep and engaging discussion. Deep conversation topics are those you discuss with someone who means something to you. We explained that we were about to pair everyone up to discuss four questions with another person. One of us (Epley) was giving a presentation at a small conference with roughly 50 high-level financial executives who had no idea what they were in for. We saw the concerns people have about opening up to strangers on full display in the first experiment we conducted as part of this research project.
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